From: x_brockj@vultur.emcmt.edu


TALKING BEAR MOUNTAIN PICNIC MASSACRE BLUES

(Moderately Bright)



(spoken)

(G)I saw it advertised (C)one day,
 
(D)Bear Mountain picnic was comin' my way, 

(G)"Come along 'n take (C)a trip, 

(D)We'll bring you up

(G)there on a ship, 

Bring the wife and (C)kids, 

Bring the (D)whole family". 

Yippee! (G) (C) (D) (G)


Well I run right down and bought a ticket
To this thing called the Bear Mountain Picnic
Little did I realize
I was in for a pleasant funny surprise
It had nothin to do with picnics
Didnt come clse to a mountain
I hate bears

Took the wife and kids down to the pier
There was six thousand people there
Everybody had a ticket for the trip
Oh Well I said, is a pretty big ship
Besides, anyhow, the more the merrier

Well, we all got on, and what do you think?
That big old boat started to sink
More peole kept a-pilin on 
That old ship was a-goin down
Funny way to start a picnic

Well, I soon lost track of my kids n wife
So may people I never saw in my life
That old ship was sinkin down in the water
There was six thousand people tryin to kill each other
Dogs a-barkin, cats a-screamin women a-yellin
men a-flyin, fists a-flyin, paper flyin
cops a-comin, me a-runnin
Maybe we better just call off the picnic

I got shoved down, got pushed around
All I remember was a moanin sound
Dont remember one thing more
All I remember is wakin up on the shore
My arms n legs were broken
My feet were splintered, my head was cracked
I couldnt walk, couldnt talk, smell, feel, couldnt see
I didnt know wher I was, I was bald
But lucky to be alive though

Well, feelin like I just stepped out of my casket
I grabbed back hold of my picnic basket
Took my wife n kids n started home
Wishin I never got up that mornin

Now, I dont care just what you do
If you want to have a picnic, thats up to you
But dont tell me about it, I dont wanna hear it
You see, I just lost all my picnic spirit
Stay in my kitchen
Have a picnic in my bathroom

Well, it dont seem to me quite so funny
What some people are going to do for money
Theres a brand new gimmick every day
Just to take somebodys  money away
I think we ought to take some of these people
Put em in a boat, send em up to Bear Mountain for a picnic